How odd to be alone without being completely so…

It’s not that I want to be alone. It’s just that I don’t want to be around other people.

The other night, I had the adult version of a temper tantrum, which is basically just going to my room, shutting myself in, and lying on the bed, in the dark, staring at the ceiling thinking increasingly morbid thoughts. I’ve done this before. It’s never pretty.

Even I occasionally get tired of saying, “O, what a mood I’m in” from time to time though, and to do that this time seems like it would be really selfish. I know a lot of people, and it seems like most of them are having a hard time in one way or another. Friends are homeless, friends are struggling with poor health, homesick, lonely, alienated, depressed, and just generally stretched to their breaking point.  This is the kind of thing that isn’t helped by well-meaning advice, or even a well-meaning shoulder to cry on, so it certainly isn’t going to help for me to put on my resident depressed person hat and talk about things from my typical myopic perspective.

Still, I feel as though I should be doing something. What, I don’t know, but certainly something.

So much for insightful, relevant, effective blogging.


One response

  1. […] been very frank on this blog in the past about my struggles with depression and self-imposed religious misery. I’ve also been pretty candid in discussing the bitter, […]

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