5 Random Thoughts For Today;
1) Next time I get the urge to publicly post a random depressed screed having nothing to do with anything in particular, I hope I have the sense to sit on my hands and just not do it. Yikes, I scare myself sometimes.
2) Television really sucks. I mean, really, really sucks. I’m living in a house with a TV for the first time in about a year, and what can I say? It really sucks! I turn it on, expecting to be entertained or at least brainwashed, and I’m alternately bored, annoyed and infuriated. It used to be that I had to watch about six hours of CNN before I started hollering obscenities and throwing shoes at the screen. Now, all it takes is one episode of Strictly Come Dancing. Just realizing how bad the title grammar is makes my blood pressure rise. I mean, really. What’s next? A new musical competition show entitled Singing Must We Do?
3) I’m sure there’s some cultural or linguistic reason for Strictly Come Dancing’s title that I just don’t get. This happens often. As a matter of fact, every time I perceived something to be weird, I usually run the thing or situation by a half-dozen people just to make sure that it was, in fact, really weird or if it’s perfectly normal for people here to do or say that sort of thing. This is especially true for social situations. Things that I think are normal are not. Things that I think are weird are completely normal. Things that I don’t think about are apparently very important and annoy the stuffing out of anyone who associates with me on a regular basis. No longer being artistically productive enough to be considered a harmless eccentric, I’m now becoming my least favorite interpersonal animal, the social neurotic. In laymans’ terms, that just means I need a vacation. Or a holiday. Either way, I still don’t like Strictly Come Dancing.
4) Snoop Dogg has reinvented himself as a singer on his latest album. Why? WHY? WHY!? He sounds like a bootleg T-Pain. And since it’s already been established that T-Pain is the bootleg Zapp and Roger, this means that Snoop Dogg is now a bootleg of a bootleg of something that was wack to begin with. No shizzle, ma nizzle. Please go back to the days of ironing your shirt while Dr. Dre wanders through your house rhyming aimlessly and pretending he isn’t wack either. Or even better, the days when you were out-rhyming 50 Cent on his own track just by spelling your name. Come on, man. Step it up, playa!
If you must expose yourself to this musical catastrophe, it’s here. Please wash after listening.
5) I’m not even going to talk about the US presidential race. Except to say that so far, Ralph Nader, you are letting me down. Ain’t nobody about to vote for Jared Ball. Let’s get real. Hurry up, announce something, and give the o.1 percent of the American population who voted for you last time something to hope for. You only have a year to win over the other 99.9 percent–get cracking!
~sigh~ I really need a vacation. Or a holiday. Maybe both.