It’s the most wonderful time of the year…

No, it is freaking not. And, hey…does Andy Williams sing about ghost stories in verse two? Wrong holiday, homie.

I used to be a Christmas nut. Started playing Burl Ives and Nat King Cole in October, had most of my shopping done by July. Christmas tree up day after Thanksgiving, apple cider on the stove and wreaths on the door by the day after that. Volunteering at shelters and gift-wrap booths, driving everyone I knew nuts dragging them from carolers to church to parties to Santa parades. Actually played Santa to every kid in a three city radius, too. For years, from December 1st to December 26th, I actually wore jingle bells.

Jingle bells, y’all. JINGLE BELLS!

Then a whole lotta life happened and a whole lot of people came and went and so on, and I just don’t care that much about Christmas anymore.

Forget the details, suffice it to say I’ve become kind of a Grinch in recent years. I like the idea of Christmas. But I feel a bit cheated on the whole family and home thing these past few years, so I don’t care to waste my time trying to replicate it just for the holidays. I’m happy to help others celebrate, but you won’t see me getting too holly jolly this Christmas.

Sorry. Jingle bells and deck them halls and all of that. Is that better?


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